Sleep.

Man, do I need some.

{Don't we all?}

Here's the thing.

Liam is still not sleeping through the night.

Dun dun dun.

We had such a good schedule going, almost right off the bat. He woke one time - every night - right about the same time, would eat and go back down. But, as the developmental milestones approached and he grew and became more aware...he started waking MORE.

Oy.

Eventually we were pretty much cosleeping with him.

Don't get me wrong, I loved me some cosleeping. It was so freaking convenient for nursing and sleeping and snuggling and baby smells and hey, I was somewhat coherent when the toddler awoke at 6:30 even though (just like a boy) Liam wants to stay up and party and then sleep until 10.

{Spoiler Alert - "Sleep when the baby sleeps" does not work when you have a toddler running around too.}

Even though we had Evelyn in our room when she was this age, and I would pull her into bed for a feeding - she went right back in the cosleeper we had. And, she was fine with it.

Liam? Not so much. Little man seems to be a total Mama's Boy so far. He wants all night access to the booby bar, and between his wakeups and Evelyn being...you know, a two year old...I will freely admit let him do whatever helped me get the most sleep.

He was straight up in bed with us. And he LOVED IT. Like, when asleep, if I scooted away from him, he would reach out a leg to touch me and make sure I was still there. If he could touch me, he would stay asleep - if not? Boom. Wake up, cry, you'd better feed me NOW WOMAN.

I was getting sort of antsy about it. I looked at the Pack and Play set up in our room and thought, why the hell do we even still have this thing taking up space in here? He is NEVER IN IT.

{Though it does make a pretty convenient bedside storage unit.}

Until I talked to my Grandma. I thought she would be straight UP IN ARMS about how unsafe, blahbity blah. And then she shocked the hell out of me and said, "Oh, of course! ALL MY BABIES SLEPT IN BED WITH ME." And by that she means all SEVEN of them, folks.

So, I settled back down and enjoyed all the cuddles. But, eventually, we decided - much like his sister - it was time for him to be in his own room, in the crib, all night long.

We started with naps and that went amazingly well.

But bedtime? Bedtime is still a struggle.

We are working on it, doing the shuffle. Keeping him in his room. Man, oh man, is it hard to keep that baby in his room. At four am, with an extremely sad faced baby staring at you? Crying at you? And you know that if you would just nurse him, he would go back to sleep so quickly?

That's hard enough. I remember that.

But then add in that he is crying and may in fact wake your toddler? And that you can't comfort both of them at the same time, so then you're going to have to call in your grumpy reinforcements (aka Daddy)?

Yikes.

All in all, I am seeing the improvements. I am reminding myself that I am teaching my son a skill. I am not being mean, I am helping him learn. And that trying to learn and understand new concepts is always a little bit frustrating.

...and it helps to remind myself that when you are six months old the only method of communication is sad faces and crying.

{He was only a month old here, his sad faces now are much more sad. And loud.}

So, we will be staying close to home this week - and try, try, trying to settle back into a schedule since those pesky teeth have arrived and SCHOOL starts in two weeks for Miss Evelyn Rae.

Oh, sleep.

Someday we will be friends again.

I sure hope it is someday soon.


Evelyn Rae is two years old, Liam is six months old

...and if these photos are new to you, you should probably be following me on Instagram.