3.

Today, we have been married for three blissful years.

I don't think I have ever had so much fun.


Evelyn Rae is eleven months old

...and sometimes I dream about her wedding day. I hope she finds someone to love, who loves her as much as her daddy and I love one another.

Eleven Months

Baby Girl,

I simply cannot believe that you will be one in just one short month. I will save my major reflections for the post that will come at that time, on your very first birthday, but for now I just want to say, I have been so lucky to experience so many of your first moments along the way. All of them, really. And I can't wait to keep hanging out with you and helping you learn new things.

This month you have really started saying "Uh Oh" in an audible and hilarious manner. You have also noticed that you get a LOT of attention from strangers when you are in a shopping cart or stroller and drop something out of the side only to look up with your cute, surprised little face and say, "Uh Oh!"

And, we are in trouble.

Because then people inevitably say it right back to you, echoing your cute little voice, and you first into the cheesiest grin ever.

You have four teeth these days contributing to that grin. Your two bottom center ones and two top ones on either side of where your two center ones will someday (soon) be.

You are eating like a fiend, as always, but are still a skinny little thing. I can't wait to see what your actual measurements are at your one year appointment.

You are interacting more and more with all of your toys, which is really fun, but your most favorite thing in the world - is a book. Any book. (Hence your photo background this month)

You are fascinated by turning pages and pointing at things, and by having Mommy and Daddy read to you. Even when we don't though, you will just sit in your room turning pages yammering away to yourself. Or, simply pulling every book off of your shelves until you find one that suits you.

You may not look like your Momma, but it turns out there is some of me inside there after all.

You are walking behind your walker and cruising around furniture still, as well as walking with your Daddy or I holding your hands, but have yet to venture out on your own. You seem to realize that you are much faster when crawling and we have also recently learned that you can climb stairs! Who knew?

I had never really let you by them before, but in just few seconds one day when your Dad thought I had you and I thought your Dad had an eye on you, you scooted halfway up our flight of stairs. We let you finish, cautiously hovering behind you, both scared out of our minds and strangely proud at the same time.

We are so excited to see what you will do, every day now (it seems) as you are really just running through learning all sorts of things. I just sit back in amazement most nights at how crazy our days seem to have gotten in the last month or so.

We love you so much bugs.

Momma


Evelyn Rae is eleven months old

...and these are the books I pick up at least four times a day.

Emotions.

So.Many.Emotions.

I told A last night.

I insisted that after the birthday dinner for my friend Jessica, we meet up down at OpSail 2012.


And ride the Ferris Wheel.


And then, when we were at the top, overlooking the beautifully lit harbor of our hometown with ships and people and a beautiful summer breeze blowing in the air...

I told him I had something for him.

Immediately his face filled with the panic that comes whenever I get him an unexpected gift.

(WHAT?! A present?! But, I didn't get you anything! Was I supposed to get you anything?! Our anniversary is in two days still right?!)



And then, I handed him two positive pregnancy tests tied up with a bow.

His jaw dropped and he grinned like a little kid.

He is thrilled. Like, thrilled thrilled.

He asked if I was joking (pretty elaborate ruse if I was, amiright?) and we both giggled a whole lot, and then he kissed me and said,

"Court, you make me so happy. This is amazing"



In short - We are thrilled.

And shocked.

And I am writing everything I am feeling here, because I can tell no one else just yet.



Evelyn Rae is a day shy of eleven months old, apparently I am four weeks-ish pregnant

...and wow.

So.

Well, I am going to go ahead and save this post in drafts, because guess what folks?

I just took two pregnancy tests.

And they were positive.

WHAT?!

I am also in shock.

I haven't even told my husband yet, who is outside painting the front porch.

The baby is outside with him in her bouncer...

...Where I placed her as I hurried out the door to my car to drive to the drugstore to buy more pregnancy tests (after I peed on an about-to-expire-one I still had in my bathroom from the last go round) with a shout over my shoulder to husband saying something vague about needing to buy a birthday card for my friend's dinner that night RIGHT NOW and thinking, "Clearly, that test was expired and now I am just freaking out for no reason."...

Clearly, not.

Good Lord.

I don't even know what to think.

Here is what is going through my mind.

1. I had half of a bottle of wine earlier today at a graduation party for Austin's step sister. WINNING.

2. This is why my skin has been breaking out and my boating has not gone away and my boobs have hurt for the last week or so. {Also my period is late. Will the wonders NEVER cease?}

3. This explains why I almost hurled making my kid breakfast a few days ago.

4. SERIOUSLY?! I JUST now fit back into my pre pregnancy jeans without looking a mess when I sit down and got up the courage to wear a bikini the other day.

5. I am in shock.

6. I am also pretty damn thrilled. Could this be for real?!

7. I guess that bottle of Chianti Classico we brought back from Italy that we were planning on drinking on our anniversary will have to wait till next year. Again.

8. Oh my gosh. This is insanity.


No, we were not planning this.
No, we were not trying.
Yes, we were using prevention.
No, I was not expecting the test to say positive when I just peed on a stick (on a WHIM I tell ya) two days after my period was late.
Yes, I was petrified it would say 'Yes' and did not think in a million kajillion years that it would.

I was just looking for an extra dose of confirmation that I could drink skinny margs to my lil heart's content at the birthday celebrations tonight!

...And yet...

My immediate reaction when it did say yes?

A smile.



Evelyn Rae is a few days shy of eleven months old, and I am four weeks along with Baby G v. 2.0 (nickname in the works)

...and...IS THIS REAL LIFE?!

Friday Photos

Whilst I have been missing from blogging, I have been snapping some photos as I chase my little cutie all over the place.

Happy Friday!


...well, that was going to be my post today. But, apparently iPhoto does not want to open on my computer. ACK! Excuse me while I freak out for a while.


Evelyn Rae is ten months old

...and if you know anything about Macs, feel free to come to my rescue. I am sure this is a lack of knowledge/new user situation. Please God.

Wanted: A Personal Assistant.

Wouldn't that be nice?

I seriously think that I would function so much more effectively if I had someone to make appointments for me, remind me what my daily schedule is, and help keep me on track...you know and to bring me lunch and coffee and such.

My husband laughed really hard when I told him this, sighing and dreaming away. He thinks it is hilariously unnecessary.

Probably because he already has one. Three guesses as to who that is.

I kid, I kid.  But, he has indeed (laughingly) called me his "cruise director" since we were oh, about 17. 

I am really, really good at making appointments and things for others. But, when it comes to myself, I just get all... squishy... about it. I always have. I am super, super awkward on the phone whenever I am making appointments for myself. Other people? Nbd.

Now, we could get all into a HUGE discussion here about how that means subconsciously that I don't value myself as much as the other people in my life and maybe even launch into a whole moral development discussion about a woman named Carol Gilligan (google her if interested) and how maybe I see goodness at this stage in my life as being all about self sacrifice...blahbity blah.

The thing is though, I really do value myself. I promise. I like looking nice, and feeling healthy and well taken care of. I know beyond a shadow of a doubt that I am a better wife and momma when I am feeling great.

Great for me means that I have had some sleep, some yummy food, a little affection from my main squeeze, and some sort of physical activity, be that a walk around the mall or a really rocking work out. Something other than watching an entire season of Downton Abbey on my television while stuffing cloth diapers and folding laundry.

Also that I like what I see when I look in a mirror. I am vain like that, but seriously, if you don't feel better when you look in the mirror and see a well groomed person without bags under their eyes v. looking like something the cat just dragged in...well, then I might be suspicious that you are a liar.

All in all, feeling good for me means feeling in balance between caring for myself, and all the other people and things that I care about.

Truth of the matter is though, I haven't made a hair appointment for myself in an embarrassingly long time. Same thing with the dentist. And doctor. And I know that I need to get on these things. Believe me. They have been transferred from one to do list to another for months.

But, they always seem to slip, in favor of something more fun and exciting. Or, you know, Pinterest.

This, from the girl who used to slip into a salon every four weeks on the dot to have her eyebrows waxed and maybe a manicure. I won't even tell you the last time I had my eyebrows waxed. ::shudder::

Now, why am I telling you all this? Welp, because telling you all seems to help me decree that I am turning over a new leaf. I am that rare breed (sarcasm much?) that needs pressure from outside sources to make things happen. I know you surely don't know anyone else in the world like that.

Even if no one says anything to me about this (and please don't come up to me and be like "Oh girl, you so obviously STILL haven't been to the hair salon/dentist/doctor...") the mere knowledge that I put this out in the ether will be a little more pressure for me to get my act in gear.

So...thanks for that.


Evelyn Rae is almost eleven months old


...and I am going to get right on making some appointments.


For myself.


After I order some birthday invitations.

Back to Normal?

We can only hope.

My poor baby, and her Momma, have had a rough couple of days.

As we headed to such a beautiful family wedding this weekend, we began battling some weird things with little Miss. Friday night, she did something that she hasn't done in months and months, in fact she really hasn't done it since she was about 7 weeks old.

She woke up in the middle of the night.

She screamed and cried and was supremely unhappy from the hours of 12:30 until 3. AM. Inconsolable. We nursed her, we rocked her, we sang to her, we let her cry, we broke out a pouch of food incase she was super hungry, we gave her teething toys. Nothing worked.

Oy. Of course, when we have such a big day the next day.

Then, she did the same thing on Saturday. And on Sunday.

She was super off schedule, refused to nap and was generally a grumpy baby when it came to sleep.

In case you don't follow me on Instagram yet.

(misscourtneyrae if you are interested, btw)

Other times she was feeling pretty much herself (though we did have our very first episode of stranger danger this weekend, too. Oy).

Skeptical and tired, but a mostly happy baby.

Then. Oh, then.

She broke out in what we thought was heat rash at the wedding. We took her down into the cool cellar (great asset for a hot day at a winery!) and the spots dissipated. Sunday morning though, bigger ones were present up and down her legs.

She's not running a fever and other than the spots and sleeping she seems her normal self, so one call to the pediatrician later and we are on a 48 hour course of Benadryl, with the thought that with so many people holding her, new places, etc. she could just be having a mild allergic reaction or irritation of some sort.

Le sigh.

The good news is, she slept through the night last night, and went down for her nap at a normal time this morning. Hopefully, we are back on track.

Cross your fingers for us.


Evelyn Rae is ten months old

...and I have SO MUCH birthday party planning to get on. Geeze Louise.