Today

Today I will forgo the continuing saga of our ill-fated road trip, because, well, even humorous and dramatic complaining about such relatively small things seem down right ridiculous today.

This morning as I flipped on the TV, hoping to catch the last remaining moments of Morning Joe on MSNBC (my most favorite and only watched news program), I instead saw a re-airing of the actual Today Show footage from September 11, 2001.

It was a shock to my system, and I found myself standing still in a moment of time travel.  I turned the broadcast on at exactly the same time that we had turned it on in my French 5 class the morning that it was actually airing live - seconds before the second plane hit.

It was Senior year, and I had just been released from AP Biology. I hit my locker up on the way to French class, as I did every morning, and my friend Justin came running up to me. 

"Have you heard?! Someone bombed the World Trade Center!"

"What? Again?" (I remembered when the bomb in the early 90s had gone off as well)

"Yeah! Let's go see if Madame Dimmick will let us turn on the TV!"

We ran around the corner to class and shouted to our teacher as we reached for the power button. And there it was, for all to see. We watched the second plane flying toward the tower and felt that we must be watching a movie. Surely, surely this wasn't actually happening.

And then, flash, I was back to the present with a toddler behind me demanding more eggs. Oh right, breakfast.

I know that I am not the only one who remembers so vividly where they were that day, and I can hardly believe that the young men and women who can now be deployed to Afghanistan were only six years old when our nation was first attacked. Six.

I looked at my daughter and realized, really realized, that this is one of those events that she will learn about in History class someday.

Mind Boggling.

We went for our morning walk and I reflected on the past 11 years. How much has changed and how much has stayed the same. I am older and have learned so much. I would like to think that my first reaction to a tragedy on the news would be somewhat more thoughtful than, “What? Again?” but it probably wouldn’t be. 

And yet, I still turn to the same set of arms for comfort as I did that day. They are a bit bigger and manlier now than they were at 17, but they hold me just as tightly. I have built a life with that boy, and that alone is such a privilege.

So today, as I pray for the families that I am sure are still continuing their struggle with grief for loved ones lost that day, I find myself humbled and so very thankful for every precious moment that I get to spend on this earth with my own loved ones. Because you just never know.

Evelyn Rae is fourteen months old today, I am 18 weeks along with Baby Ferris

… and ::hugs:: friends.