Wednesday, February 13, 2013

Giving Up

It's Ash Wednesday y'all.

And though I am Catholic, we didn't quite make it to church today, oops.

Life with a newborn, amirite JC? ::looks up hopefully::

In any case, as this Lenten season begins, I have thought and thought about what to give up. Pregnancy (and breastfeeding to some extent) has you already give up some of the best vices. Plus, I have given that stuff up in the past - yadda yadda.

Mountain Dew (back when I drank it), Caffeine, Chocolate, Swearing, blah blah. Done all of that.

This year, I have decided (based on the inspiration of many others) that I am not going to give up tangible things, but I am going to give up things that are bad for me anyway. Things that by eliminating, will hopefully make me more of the person that I aspire to be.

This Lenten season I will be giving up...

Resentment and Complaining

See, the thing is, I don't consider myself a really unhappy person or anything, but I do love a good wallow occasionally. And I love a little nugget of, "I'm right and you're wrong" to relish in my head from time to time.

Right. This.

I also realize that having a newborn and indulging in family time and baby snuggles is maybe an easier time to realize just how blessed in life I am. And maybe I wouldn't be very resentful or complaint right now anyway thanks to those sweet newborn smells and little toes alongside the toddler faces of joy and discovery...

[It is also a time to look over at your snoring husband as you blearily feed a newborn who can only be consoled by you and your boobs, and think nasty thoughts...let's be honest.]

However, I want this to be a permanent change. Not saying that I will give all of this up and be the PERFECT person forever and ever, amen. But, I would like to make an effort toward a long term attitude adjustment. Sarcasm is different than simply complaining, and I know when I am saying something if it is meant to provide an amusing eye roll, or if it is a true complaint that I have chosen to whine about, rather than strive to change.

At the end of the day...

I want to be the person that I want my kids to be.

We'll see how it goes.

Evelyn Rae is 19 months old, Liam is 4 days old

...and on a completely unrelated to this post note - my milk is officially in. I forgot how impressive these  super engorged boobies are. Holy crap, y'all. 

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