Tuesday, July 31, 2012

One a Day

Welp, here marks another notch in the "my baby is growing up and becoming a toddler" belt.

We are slowly transitioning to the one nap a day.

I think.

This weekend she acted all TOTALLY READY and into it.

Yesterday? Girl took two two hour naps. I legit had to wake her up in the afternoon so she wouldn't sleep too long and then never go down at bedtime. She was not.happy.with.me.

Can you blame her? I can get straight MEAN when people wake me up before I am ready.

This morning she was going STRONG, not rubbing her eyes, laughing and gigging when I tickled her, playing, all of it.

Then all of a sudden, she came over to me, climbed up on my lap, yanked on my shirt like she wanted to nurse and was out. That was 10:45. Granted, she had been up since 6.

Not quite late enough for a one a day nap though, especially because we got a good sized breakfast in before hand and a snack of her favorite crackers, but no lunch. Now I have freshened up on all my transition techniques after a good pep talk from some Facebook friends that, indeed, people do transition their babies to one a days around this age, and I know that this will be a bit of a process. Cross your fingers for us!

Oh, sleep.

It seems to come so naturally as an adult. Who knew there was so much teaching involved with babies? And, erm, toddlers? Oy. I cannot believe my baby is becoming a toddler.

Excuse me while I go cry.

Evelyn Rae is twelve months old

...and it always seems to be the strangest milestones that get to me.

Like how I could put her hair in pigtails the other day. ACK! She looked like a LITTLE GIRL.

Sunday, July 29, 2012

12 weeks

Boo. Feeling like you have the flu everyday for a couple of hours is obnoxious. Thankfully, my husband is awesome and has really been hanging tough when he gets home. 

Awful. Where's my glow, dammit? When did it happen last time? I have to go back and look. I remember having AWESOME skin and hair when pregnant, and this is not.the.same. 

I think doing pretty well, still smallish and able to wear non maternity clothes, buttoned and zipped and everything! Woot woot!

Mexican and sushi. Just like last time. Though I don't have crazy cravings for tortilla chips...instead it seems a it more like a bite of ice cream or something sweet, but just a bite and i am satisfied. Which is also weird, because one time I ate an entire 9x13 yellow cake with chocolate frosting by myself, in two days. It might have had something to do with the fact my boyfriend had just left for OCS and I am a stress eater. Maybe.

More of the same. Periodic stretching and moving pains.

Sleep. I need it. The Olympics are NOT helping things. 

Not too bad so far...KNOCK ON WOOD

The Girls
Not that sore. Weird. Also, not getting bigger which is totally lame. When this belly finally pops, I am going to need bigger boobs to look proportional for at least a while.

New this time around
Feelings of lightheadedness. It has happened twice so far, which is weird because I don't really remember that as a symptom with Ev.

Oh yeah, this again.
Gagging when brushing my teeth. The miracle of growing life, people. THE MIRACLE.

Mental State
I think I am starting to be in a bit of denial. It is weird because the husband and I are in a bit of a holding pattern with a bunch of different things in life, so we are just hanging and not able to really plan or react or be proactive...which does not generally sit well with people like us.

Evelyn Rae is one year old, and I am 12 weeks along with Ferris 

... and is that a ridiculous nickname for an in utero baby? I kinda like it. Ferris wheel being the big reveal spot and all. Hrm. 

Thursday, July 26, 2012

Why, friends, why?

Why must I tempt fate by writing about my lack of pregnancy symptoms in comparison to my last pregnancy? WHY?

Hubris, that's why.

Will I never learn?

The last few days have.been.miserable.

It is as if all of my lack of pregnancy symptoms that could have been spread over the last 11 weeks have gone ahead and compounded into the last 72 hours or so. My hormones are all, "HA! You thought you were on the downhill slope toward twelve weeks and happy go lucky fun second trimester? Just the calm before the storm, sister."

As I write this, I am awake next to my snoring and sleeping peacefully husband, with a pounding headache, nausea and heartburn. Insomnia AND feeling kicked by some wacko flu illness? Sign.me.up.

Oh, and I will probably have to get up to pee again here in a minute.

I mean...

Let me reframe.

Thank God for my husband. He has literally taken over the house the last few days are coming home from work. He has cooked dinner the last three nights whilst I lay on the couch under a blanket trying not to throw up all over the place from the hours of 4-9 pm. He didn't even blink when I, no joke, RAN from the kitchen last night to avoid the smell of grilled chicken.

He has also done bedtime for Ev for the last three nights.

Bless that man.

It is just so.weird. To feel fine and dandy all day and then just BOOM, on the couch, blanket, wanting my Mommy, watching awful summer TV, blah-ness.

Dear second trimester, I am eagerly anticipating your arrival. Like, very eagerly.

Evelyn Rae is twelve months old and I am 11 weeks and 5 days along with my newest little miracle

...and Miss or Mister Miracle and I had a good long talk earlier today about helping Mommy feel better in the next few days.


Where did my adventurous eater BLW baby go?

Girl used to eat EVERYTHING and LOVE it.

Now? Now she wants crackers. And that's pretty much it.

Granted we have these babies for her...

...so I don't feel too bad about her eating them all the time, but seriously. This is getting ridiculous.

Maybe it's that dang molar coming in?

Maybe it's just a phase.

(It has only been like this for maybe like 4 days or so...)

God, please don't let it be that she is actually developing her own tastes and opinions and hates my cooking all of a sudden.

I don't think I could take the criticism.

Evelyn Rae is one year old

...and she really does eat other things, but the only thing she is happy about eating are those dang crackers.

Tuesday, July 24, 2012

Baby Swap

Last night, we finally saw The Dark Knight Rises, thanks to our long discussed and finally realized baby swap plans with our friends.

Yup, that's right - baby swap. We dropped Ev with our friends last night, and sometime in the next week or so, we will grab their kids so they can do the same.

Everyone should do this!

If you have friends who are interested, that is.

We have talked about baby swapping for so long, but we kept wavering about it because when we do get a night out away from the kiddos, we don't want them all to be just date nights with our spouses. Sometimes we would like to see our friends as well, the very friends who are willing to swap.

But, when your friends are your babysitters...well...right...doesn't work.

Finally, we realized that we can do both.

So, if you want to try this out too, my advice is this - baby swap with your friends if they are:

  1. Friends who are really, really interested
  2. Friends you can trust to be fair and not take advantage (duh)
  3. Friends you can be super honest with and again (duh) trust with your kids
  4. Friends you will STILL hang out with other than hellos and goodbyes as you are dropping off your kids! You don't want to ruin a friendship for the sake of childcare
Luckily, we have lots of friends around these parts that we have known for forever, so we are really happy that we have finally realized this genius plan while we can. 

Who knows if this will work at our next duty station.

Evelyn Rae is one year old

...and you should try it if you can!

Monday, July 23, 2012

Happy Monday!

The Dentist was, not bad.


No cavities, or concerns....also surprising. And relieving. Whew.

And, in honor of baby girl and I getting our lives right, and finally recovering from vacation and party comas - we are back on schedule today...cleaning and blogging!

Which means that I have FINALLY posted Ev's Eleven Month update, per usual it was held up by my laziness about uploading photos. You can find it where it belongs, on June 11, or here.

Evelyn Rae is now TWELVE months old

...and we will get her 12 month update up in the next few days.

Sunday, July 22, 2012

11 weeks

Ugh. WHY did I tempt the fates and insist I felt so much better this time around?! This week has been awful. Still no puking, but much laying on the couch from about 5-7 every day going "uggggggggh."

Hello, my name is Courtney and I am not 16 and pregnant, so why does my face seem to think we are all of a sudden. Boo. 4 "blemishes" on my chin alone. Bah humbug.

Gaining weight, still wearing regular clothes - I need to convince husband to snap a pic so I can compare to this time last time. Granted, I was able to hide it from everyone for a long time last time, so mayhap I look the same?

Ugh, Nausea = food sounds awful. Except when not nauseous and food sounds WONDERFUL. Meh.

More of the same. Periodic stretching and moving pains.

I need more.sleep. I don't think I felt this tired when Ev was like a little newborn waking up every three hours. Now I just want to beg her for more time in the mornings. Poor baby. She wants to play and I want to SLEEP.

Bought Tums. Used them once so far. SIGH.

The Girls
Still not that sore. *Knock on wood* Also, not really increasing in size the way they did last time? Maybe that comes later?

Fetal Movement
Nope, not yet. I think I will omit this category until I feel something. 

None, yay! Also - getting rid of this category until needed. Hopefully never.

New this time around
When I am feeling my worst, usually from 5-7pm or so, I am not coming home from work this time and flinging myself on the couch all dramatic like. Instead, A is coming home from work and I am handing him Ev all dramatic like. He is taking good care of me though, last night he actually cooked dinner. With no instruction. And it was edible! Yay husband.

Oh yeah, this again.
EMOTIONS. I just cried like a baby yesterday because I randomly caught the last 5 minutes of an old Friends episode where Ross finds out he's having a boy. Geeze Louise. 

Mental State
Doing ok. Slowly recovering from the shock of such an unanticipated transition. See here's the thing about transitions, thanks to my transition theory knowledge via grad school, you develop coping mechanisms for transitions by going through them in your life. You naturally pick things up along the way. 

I am a PRO at dealing with anticipated transitions. Things you know are coming - hello military life, amiright? But, unanticipated transitions? Welp, they throw me for a loop. See, just about everything in my life to this point has gone according to plan (with a few exceptions, you know like moving our wedding at the last minute and stuff like that). That makes me sound like such a SNOT, but it's sort of true. Soooo, I don't really have a whole lot of coping mechanisms in my arsenal for them. BUT, I am learning, and also wavering between hella excited and HOLY SHIZZ we are having another kid.

Evelyn Rae is one year old, and I am 11 weeks along with poor baby who still has no nickname

...and how do you tell your one year old they are going to be a big sister? Anyone?

Wednesday, July 18, 2012

Bad Example

Friends, today is the day. I am going to the dentist for the first time in, well, an embarrassingly long amount of time that I am choosing not to disclose.

Mainly so that I can keep up the charade I have going of being a responsible adult, who, you know, takes care of her own business.

Moving on.

Today is one of those days that I am really glad Evelyn can't quite understand what Momma is talking about, because I would be setting a very bad example. I know these days are waning, so I am thoroughly enjoying my ability to whine and complain about this appointment today like the 12 year old girl I once was. (Who, mind you, didn't mind going to the dentist at all.)

I know, you should go to the dentist, and prevention and blah. And I promise that this is the beginning of MUCH more regular visits as I strive to be a shining example for my kiddos of what a responsible grown up looks like, that taking care of yourself is important, etc.

But still.

I don't have to like it.


Evelyn Rae is twelve months old

...and one of her favorite things in the world is to have her teeth brushed. All six of em.

Tuesday, July 17, 2012

Lovely Day

Whew. I feel, at ease.

Yesterday was a perfect day for me and my little girl, getting back into routine and, well, normalcy. We both needed it. Seriously. She didn't even fight me the slightest bit on naps or routine of any kind. She looked relieved each time I put her into bed.

And now we feel normal.

And I am ready to be back to blogging.

I miss this little blog when I am gone for a while.

Really, it has all been a nice, downward slope back into our normal life since her party on Saturday, which was so awesome.

Food, friends, fun.



Here are some sneaks until I do my actual post. Thanks to my lovely friends for taking photos, as I didn't take a single one all day.

Evelyn Rae is one year old

...and it really was a lovely day, despite the rain and no rain plan.

Monday, July 16, 2012

10 weeks

Alrighty, it's 10 weeks...and you know what that means. Time for the symptom round ups to begin.

Here are the categories this time around:

Not as bad as it has been. Let's hope that this trend continues. I have gagged a few times when brushing my teeth (surprise surprise after last time around, right?). Tomorrow, I have a dentist appointment and am a little worried about keeping my mouth open for that whole time and having someone digging in my mouth and not throwing up all over them. How embarrassing would that be?
Not as bad as when I was pregnant with Ev. Mostly I just look freaking exhausted.

I have gained at least five pounds as of my appointment last Wednesday. I haven't started wearing anything maternity yet, even though at this point with Ev I was WAY into Belly Bands and such. It probably helps that a. it is summer and b. I am not wearing work clothes every day. Holy belly though, it is super weird that I look...um, pregnant. Well, with my clothes off where I can only see it. Weight gain all in the belly and higher up than if I were just gaining weight...if that makes sense.

Making eggs for my little bug in the mornings are sometimes a struggle. Let alone eating them. As with my last pregnancy I could exist on Mexican and sushi alone. Yet, today I noticed for the first time in the last few weeks - I am HUNGRY. Like, starving. Every morning for the past few weeks I have had the same thing for breakfast - whole wheat english muffin, turkey sausage patty, cheddar cheese. This morning - I had two. HUNGRY.

Periodic stretching and moving pains. You know. The uze.

Not too bad yet, mainly because I am so freaking exhausted. Running around after a one year old, while ten weeks pregnant, sigh. Tired. 

With weird random peaks of energy here and there? Weird.

Twice so far. Lord help me. This is the one singular symptom that I am looking the least forward to returning.

The Girls
Not as sore as I would have anticipated. Is that weird? I mean, a. they haven't started getting bigger yet (which is weird for me, because I won't lie, I was sort of looking forward to the return of pregnancy boobs. and b. they are slightly tender, but hello - breastfeeding a one year old with six teeth. Whole bother post about breastfeeding/weaning/pregnancy coming some other time.

Fetal Movement
Nothing yet, of course. Though I have felt these little popping feelings a few times in the last few days that remind me of how fetal movement eventually felt...but Little Bump is only like just under two inches at this point, so yeah, shouldn't be able to feel anything. Duh. Trippy though.

None, yay! I am hopeful for now that I will see only a little bit of swelling since the height of pregnancy will come in the winter.

New this time around
Overall, I feel a lot of the same symptoms, but...less? None of the symptoms are quite as intense as I thought they were last time. Does this mean I was a bigger complainer last time? I don't think so. I think it was also seasonal. When I was exhausted with Ev, it didn't help that I left for work when it was dark out and came home when it was dark. Boo to winter.

Oh yeah, this again.
Tired, Nausea...you know. Oh, and emotions. MOOD SWINGS ARE SO COOL. And they never make you fight with your husband unnecessarily. Or take things too personally. Or make you cry within the first ten minutes of the movie Cheaper by the Dozen when it randomly comes on HBO in the middle of the day. Right.

Mental State
Pretty much still in shock. I have happy moments and moments of pure and utter disbelief. I have been honest with family members who know about the fact that I wasn't quite ready to give my body back over to pregnancy diet and rules...and heartburn. But, I am still excited. And still in shock. I can't conceptualize having two kiddos running around. But, at this point while pregnant with Ev, I couldn't picture a one year old who I would love so much - I could barely even picture a newborn baby depending on me. So, it will come.

10 weeks, last go round

Evelyn Rae is one year old, and I am 10 weeks along with Peanut

...and Husband insists on referring to baby as "Peanut" until we come up with something different. Hrm.

Friday, July 13, 2012

Twelve Months

Evelyn Rae,

Here it is, today you are a whole year old. It is such a momentous occasion because it is seemingly one of your few remaining "firsts"- your very first birthday. The thing is, though, you have so many more firsts in front of you, my darling girl. Each one better than the last - good or bad - because they will shape you into the woman that you will grow to be.

This letter will reflect how you have changed in the last month, but also how you have changed in the last year. Because, though you may have emerged into the world a year ago today, over the last year, oh my, how you have really emerged. Your personality and essence and huge identity have just come bursting out of that little body in the past 365 days.

And what of that personality? You, my little ladybug, are such a joy to be around. You are simply the happiest child. I cannot wait until I can get a real peek into that amazing mind of yours. You are learning by leaps and bounds - a natural student. I watch you study things so intently these days, and I can just see the wheels of discovery turning in your mind as you connect this piece and that. You are such a contemplative little thing. You have a natural curiosity that leads you into adventures as fast as your little body can crawl - yes, that's right, crawl.

You aren't walking just yet, but I know that it will happen any day. Though, then again, maybe it won't. You have proven your Momma wrong before. You have been cruising around furniture for months, but haven't taken that leap of faith out on your own just yet. I know it's coming and that one day - you will decide to just do it. That's how you do many things; checking it out, thinking about it, savoring that thought and thought process for a while, and then, next thing I know, you are just doing it. No practice runs, just totally in, with your whole body and soul. I love watching the process, the quiet face, then the scrunched up eyebrows and finally the excelling, with a look of confidence as if you knew you could do it all along.

You know what you want and when you want it, and when those two things align, it is so very fun to watch you and the endless mirth that ensues. You clap your hands and say, "Yay!" and laugh and giggle to your little heart's content. When those two things, don't align, however, well, you are not afraid to let us know you are unhappy. You lower those impossibly dark, long eyelashes of yours over those big blue eyes, and have set about practicing the most adorable pout I have ever seen. Or the most mind rattling spout of anger that I can imagine coming from such a small person. You certainly have spirit in leaps and bounds.

The biggest thing that happened this month - that you won't remember of course - is that we told you that you are going to be a big sister! This was quite the surprise to your Mommy and Daddy like you, and though you have absolutely no idea what is coming, I have already started to dream about the kind of relationship you will have with your future sibling. My dearest wish is, I am sure just like every Mother, for you to have a close and loving relationship.

One of support and encouragement, and yes, some teasing and tormenting. It really makes for better stories when we are all laughing around the kitchen table in 25 years or so. You two will be so close in age, I cannot wait to see what life will be like by your next birthday.

You are still nursing once a day, in the morning, and I think it may be my favorite time of day. I go grab you out of your bed upon hearing you wake, and bring you into my bed to snuggle with me and nurse. You giggle and point at things and I tell you their names, and you just absorb it all into that little sponge like brain of yours. I love that we get that time to just be together, and it makes it all sweeter to know that this phase, like so many others will soon be coming to an end.

Oh, bug. I can barely believe that is was an entire year ago that you made me a Mom. I love every little snuggle and smile that you have given me. They have expanded and filled inside my heart, making it so much bigger than it was at this time last year. I know that all of your new developments and additions will continue to do so. Each time you say "Momma" continues to prove that theory.

I love you so much my little bug. And though I sing it to you every night, I want you to know that it is true - you are my sunshine.

Happy Birthday, sweet girl.

With all my heart,

Your Momma.

Evelyn Rae is ONE YEAR OLD, I am nine weeks pregnant

...and, wow.

Thursday, July 12, 2012

At least...

Even with all the craziness that is planning for Ev's party...

At least I can't look at Pinterest and get even crazier right now.


Because the recipe photos make my preggo stomach want to upchuck.


Evelyn Rae is one year old and I am nine weeks along with "Olive"

...that's the size of the baby this week.

Apologies, Apologies

The last few weeks have been a WHIRLWIND, my friends.

From the Outer Banks of North Carolina to drop off Ev, to Louisville Kentucky to get back into the swing of all things sorority, back to the OBX to pick up Ev, home for a day, then up to Wisconsin, then to my family's cabin, then back to my parent's house and finally back home Tuesday night.


And then yesterday was Ev's birthday.

And Friday is her one year well baby visit.

And Saturday is her party.

And my cell phone will now only charge when held at a certain angle.

And I am a maniac.

Sigh. At least I am unpacked?

I have a bunch of updates that will randomly get thrown up here as I can - you know like Ev's 11 month update? Ahem, just a tad late.

ANYWHO. I am crazy and life is crazy, but it will all be caught up once Sunday rolls around.

Let's pray.

Evelyn is one year old

...and I think I may be stealing husband's phone upgrade since his comes up first. I deserve it right?

Wednesday, July 11, 2012

9 weeks, First Appointment

Welp, it's officially official!

We are due with Deuxième (still working on a suitable nick name this one is "second" en Francais) February 10, 2013.

I can hardly believe it.


We had our first appointment today, and as part of it, we had our very first ultrasound.

(Along with an amazing amount of blood work, urine samples, Pap smear, cultures, internal exams, blood pressure, weight, and an amazing amount of joking about 'frequent customer' punch cards, etc.)

The ultrasound tech took a gamble and went for the belly ultrasound rather than vaginal - and there it was - there he or she was.

Our little peanut; heart beating, reclining on his or her little yolk sac, just like a pillow.

Holy moly.

Lying there, with my husband holding our firstborn, on her very first birthday, looking at the beating heart of our second child, well. That, friends, is mind boggling stuff.

I will probably start doing some symptom write ups shortly - I think I started at about 10 weeks with Ev. I am interested to see if things will be different this go round.

So far, nausea, sore boobs (p.s. teething baby nursing already on sore pregnancy boobs? WOWZA.), exhaustion, are all there. Check, check, check.

Oh, and I have gained at least five pounds already.
And my belly is firm.
And starting to look pregnant.

Apparently, my body super enjoys being knocked up. Cool.

Evelyn Rae is ONE TODAY, and I am nine weeks preggo with 'Petit' (it means 'little one' in French. I kinda like it.)

...and this whole thing is still.just.so.crazy.


One year ago today, I delivered my beautiful baby girl into this world. That day was so full.

Full of pain, sweat, work, and ultimately joy, laughter and an unshakeable awe at our own everyday miracle.

I can hardly believe that those moments were an entire year ago.

It seems like yesterday, but at the same time - I can't really remember what life was like without Miss Evelyn in that little space, reserved just for her, in my heart.

In that moment, everything changed, and yet the transition was so natural and immediate.

Today, in reflecting on the past year, I finally understand why a birthday is such a momentous occasion. I have always sort have felt that birthdays were cool and all, but meh. What's the big deal?

Now, I get it. It is, in fact, a big deal.

Your birthday is a day to celebrate that you entered the world, that your entire being and soul was suddenly here, sharing in the space of the universe with all the other people out there.

The fact that I had a part in bringing another soul into this world, someone who has already intersected paths with so many, and will only continue to do so, is just so, so awesome.

Evelyn Rae, I have so many dreams for you already. Nothing specific, because I want you to make your own decisions, but instead vague and sweeping emotions that I hope you live in a state of, every day. The biggest is that you will be truly happy in your life.

Whatever your choices, I so desperately want you to be happy.

You have taught me so much, in such a relatively short time.

I have never had so much patience for a person, well, ever. Maybe your Daddy... maybe. But patience just seems to pour out of me in unending amounts when it comes to you. I will admit that some days it does seem like it might just be coming to the end, but amazingly, it never does.

You have taught me to be still, and enjoy little moments. To stop and smell the flowers, and to stare with you in wonderment at new things that you are encountering.

You have renewed my fascination with education, after I had become so burnt out at the lack of those magical, teachable moments in my last "real" job.

You, my little love bug, amaze me every day.

You make me laugh, every day.

You make me shake my head, every day.

You make me kiss your Daddy, because I am so proud that you are a bit of both of us, every day.

You make me love you, even more, every day.

I can't wait to see what you will teach me as time goes on.

Happy Birthday, Evelyn Rae.

You, and your Daddy, are the best things to ever happen to me.

Evelyn Rae is ONE

...and my heart has been so full of emotions the last few days, I'm not even sure I could accurately describe it, no matter how hard I try.