But here's the thing, he or she could be.
I mean, what?!
A few weeks ago, I posted a little tiny tidbit about a little joke played by Mother Nature, and most people in my real life have made a definite comment to me about it, so I guess my little sideways glance, drop it in here casually, tactic, was, well, not so subtle.
Yes, we had a pregnancy scare. ("Scare" isn't really the word I want to use here, because we would, of course, be happy about another one on the way...but there was a definite mix of emotions...and I can't think of a better word in this moment.) I will write more about that on another day.
But, how, you may be thinking, did that happen? Don't women get a grace period after giving birth and don't have ovulation, etc. for a while following a baby?
Well, some women do.
So, here is a post that I wrote months and months ago (in OCTOBER), but never hit the publish button on, I dunno why, but here it is, along with a few editing updates along the way.
*Warning: this post is going to be about female things, like menstruation. Feel free to stop reading if that sort of thing makes you uncomfortable...though if it does, I don't know how you've made it through a majority of posts on this blog.*
One of the agreed upon side benefits of pregnancy is undoubtedly, no periods. Amiright? No tampons to tote around in your purse, not having to worry about when you will wear certain clothes, all good stuff. One of the additional benefits of exclusively breastfeeding (for most people) is that you get to lengthen the time before Aunt Flo returns for a visit.
Unless you are me.
I got off pretty easily on the post-partum bleeding. After two weeks and a few days, I was back to normal. But then, about four weeks after giving birth, I started seeing secondary signs of fertility (read: changes in cervical fluid. gah. I know, I know, but this is the truth, yo).
I thought I must be losing it, there was no way, and then figured that it may just be due to normal hormonal shifts, etc. post baby. After all, I was exclusively breastfeeding, and my baby is gaining weight as she should be, etc. etc.
But then, two weeks later, exactly six weeks after giving birth, Aunt Flo came a knockin'.
I, of course, accepted this inevitable return with ALL the grace and decorum that I usually possess. In other words, I freaked out, ran to tell my husband, called my mom and then my midwife in a panic.
My husband looked at me and shrugged. "Didn't our childbirth classes say that your body would know that it can't support more than one baby at a a time?" THANK YOU HUSBAND.
My mom said, "Oh honey, I think that happened to me too." THANKS FOR THE HEADS UP MOM.
And my midwife said, "Well you have your six week appointment this Friday, so let's just check you out then." ::sigh::
What followed was the no holds barred worst period of my WHOLE LIFE. I mean, something that happens once a month since you were 12, you sort of get a handle on what your "normal" is like. This was not my normal. (In the six months since I wrote this, things have indeed returned to my normal, but those first few were ROUGH indeed.)
When I got to my appointment, my midwife checked me out and cheerily said, "Yup you are good, everything is healed and fine, and you are indeed having a period. You are just what we call 'fertile Myrtle' so be careful!"
"Be careful? I wasn't even cleared to get back in the saddle until this appointment!"
(I don't really say "back in the saddle" in real life, btw. But I said something equivalent..ish.)
She also assured me that it was "totally normal" to have a heavy first period back in the swing of things.
I guess this is how Irish twins happen?
Evelyn Rae is
...and we do want more babies...you know...eventually.