This one isn't too awful, right?
And only $200! What a steal.
Just as I thought I had arrived at a decision about staying at home, my dream job (for this area) was posted. Like a day after I confidently spoke aloud that I had made my decision to some of my close friends.
Ack. My life.
In any case, they posted it.
And made it harder for me to achieve.
Let me explain a little bit without going into too much detail. This position oversees a specific part of Student Affairs at a local university, but also serves in a Assistant Director capacity for the office that that specific area falls under. Or it used to. Now it is an Associate Director position.
Associate > Assistant
I was totally qualified when the position was Assistant, but now it's a bit of a reach, so we will see what happens. I still put in all of my information, because -let's face it- if I didn't I would kick myself forever.
Of course, the timeline for interviewing falls directly in line with me being, oh, 38 weeks pregnant or so (or maybe even 40!). But, I am not going to count my chickens or stress about that until I know that I am even thought of for an interview by the committee. I am certainly not banking on it.
I will be honest in that the possibility of this position scares me a bit as well. It is my absolute favorite area to work in, and something that I am so passionate about - but I have been out of the field for 2 years. That may not seem like a lot, but it feels like eons to me. What if I can't cut the mustard anymore? I used to be great at this stuff - I don't want to be mediocre. Especially because I am balancing two new roles at the same time.
But, that's also why this job appeals to me. I love.it. And I know that I could rise to the challenge given an opportunity to be passionate about my work again.
Moment of self doubt, over.
In the meantime, the not knowing how this will go has my head swirling with thoughts of daycare options, getting on waiting lists, all sorts of things that I just do not want to deal with at the moment.
Mayjah life decisions. Being a grown up. Blah.
Current feelings on the situation: if it is meant to be, then awesome, if not, that's awesome too. No regrets either way. I would love to have the experience of this particular position, especially since I have NO idea where the Navy will take us in the future, but at the same time...gah. Ongoing debate, pro and con lists, etc. in my head.
I would like to go back to summers full of lemonade stands and running through the sprinkler.
Who's with me?
33 weeks, 6 days along
...and I am too exhausted to really think about all of this right now. Is this the third trimester sleepiness everyone has been telling me about?